…and why I don’t make them.

I used to. I believed in the idea that I could set a goal on a random day and make it happen. I’ll lose 20 pounds, I’ll go to the gym every day, I’ll eat clean/raw/keto, I’ll make more money, I’ll find true love, I’ll save up for a car, etc. We all have goals and dreams. I don’t think it’s my place to tell anyone not to have them or how to make them happen.

However, I decided years ago that I was going to pick a word to guide myself through the year and live my life according to that word. Now, you could pick words like patience, grace, dedication, etc. but I like to look outside English, or at least outside the norm, to find words that don’t translate exactly or have a larger meaning than can be summarized in a word or two. My first year, I picked Hygge. I lived my year creating beauty and warmth in my world. I still live in the place in which I spent time creating that environment. So while the year is over, the benefits live on. Last year, I picked Kintsugi and spent the year exploring all the places I felt like my life and my world needed to be repaired because something was broken or falling apart. I learned to see the repairs as part of who I am and stop trying to hide imperfections. I reap the benefits of choosing kintsugi every day. This year I have chosen Ambedo.

So this year I am going to spend the year going slowly enough that I can see the experiences that exist in my world. The experiences that are waiting for me to stop and watch and feel. The snowflakes landing on a mitten, the way the wind blows off the ocean smelling like salt air and seaweed and far-away places, the way the ice melts on warm days and drips into pools that feed the earth. All of it requires that I stop and really look around. So in 2022 don’t be surprised to see me staring at the rain as it hits the pond or watching the crocuses grow through the snow, or breathing in deeply to smell the summer mix of hot tar and warm air and citronella and watching the fireflies create magical patterns in the night sky, or swishing through piles of leaves and smelling the scent of fall while eating an apple I just picked.

When I stop and think about it, I hope we all have an opportunity to experience some ambedo moments of our own. I think the world needs us each to be able to stop and see things. But if you need someone to experience things with, reach out to your friends and family. I’d be willing to bet there are more people looking for ambedo moments than you might think. The last two years have been hectic, and we could all use some moments of awe and a feeling of being part of something majestic and massive that is outside of ourselves.

Happy New Year